


That's When I Knew

by teamchasez



Category: NSYNC, Pop Music RPF
Genre: F/M, Gen, NSYNC - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 01:06:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17193602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teamchasez/pseuds/teamchasez
Summary: There were plenty of instances that should have had Rachel over her ex-boyfriend, but in every man she tried to date, she still saw him. Until she met JC Chasez.





	That's When I Knew

**Author's Note:**

> The idea for this story came from the song "That's When I Knew" by Reba McEntyre.

“What are you waiting on?”

“I’m not over Jeff, Mel. It’s too soon.” Rachel Michaels told her best friend. She sat in the one bedroom apartment she rented in Orlando, Florida. She’d been in Florida since she graduated college two years ago. While there were no shortage of open nursing positions in Ohio, she applied for – and was hired – at Orlando Regional.

“It’s been two years Rach. You have two years and a thousand miles between you guys now.”

Jeff had been her college sweetheart. They met as freshman at Ohio State. She was a backwoods baby. Born and raised in the country. Hicktown. Jeff was a trust fund baby attending his father’s alma mater. Their differences didn’t matter. They were inseparable. In love. They had been making future plans – engagement, marriage, babies. Everything. He was being groomed to take over his father’s business. Already had a position upon graduation. Right there in Columbus. She had a list of possible nursing positions in the greater Columbus area. 

Then right before graduation. He broke up with her. No warning. No indications anything was wrong. He simply told her it was over and walked out of the off campus apartment they shared together. Her heart had been shattered. She’d been so devastated she had failed her nursing exam the first try. For weeks all she could do was cry. She tried to contact him but he ignored all her attempts at communication. She tried going to his father’s business but after the second try, they told her not to come back. Reality had set in. She had no job. Very little money. She’d spent four years in college and nothing to show for it. Her degree was worthless if she didn’t pass the same exam

Melissa had shown up on her door step. She had manage to pull her out of her massive depression to being only 75% depressed. Melissa had registered her to retake the exam at the next possibility and paid the fees. Then spent the week quizzing her from a practice exam. The morning of her test, Melissa forced her out of bed and took her to the building where the text was taking place. It had been comical watching Melissa trying to navigate Columbus. It would have been scary if Rachel hadn’t been depressed and going through points of not even caring what happened.

When she received her results, Rachel called up Melissa crying. A day later she received an eviction notice on her apartment door. Rent hadn’t been paid. Either she needed to pay or get out.. An aunt on her father’s side lived in Florida and she figured that was the right amount of distant she needed. A month of sleeping on her couch and doing odd jobs around her horse farm, Rachel had been hired at Orlando Regional. Armed with enough money for first and last month’s rent, get utilities turned on, and a few bucks left to live on until she got her first paycheck, she left her aunt behind and drove to Orlando.

Like Melissa said it had been two years. She had put five states between her and Jeff. It hadn’t been enough. Her heart still ached for the man she had spent four years of her life with. The man who made her laugh. Who pulled her away from her books to truly experience college life. There had been a handful of dates from coworkers trying to set her up. There had even been a date with a guy who had come in to the emergency room during her shift she had picked up when they were short handed. Each time was a failure. Every time she looked across the table she saw Jeff. It was Jeff’s brown eyes staring back at her. It was Jeff’s brown hair, styled in a fade she saw. It was the button up shirt and pressed pants and polished shoes. It was the bright smile with the perfect teeth. Even the cologne was wrong.

Dating was fruitless. It proved she was not over Jeff - not by a long shot. How could she date a guy when all she saw was Jeff? It wasn’t fair to the guy across the table she wished was someone else. No. She couldn’t date until she was truly over Jeff. Whenever that may be.

“I’m just not ready yet.”

Rachel was thinking about her conversation with Melissa the next day at lunch. Usually she sat in the cafeteria talking with other nurses, but today she snuck off to her car. She wanted to be alone. Melissa’s phone call had triggered dreams about Jeff. He’d been on her mind all morning. The memories. The moments they shared. The pain of the break up. Everything was still fresh in her mind like it happened two days ago instead of two years ago. 

Everyone – Melissa, her parents, her aunt, her coworkers – seemed to think his memory should have been left behind the moment he walked out. It had a strangle hold on her. Even the memory of his back as he walked out wasn’t enough to kill the feelings she had for him. His parting ‘goodbye’ said in a manner like they had only been friends – like the last four years meant nothing – wasn’t enough. Jeff was on her mind; close to her heart. The amount of tears she had cried over him was enough to fill Ohio Stadium. Some crying jags lasted hours of deep wrenching sobs that came from way down deep. They left her eyes swollen for days and her voice hoarse.

The day before she left her aunt’s house for Orlando, she made a fire in the burn barrel. There she opened the box she had stuffed all the memories of her and Jeff. Hundreds of photos. Concert stubs. Playbills. The flyer for the party where they had first met. Movie stubs. Every piece of paper, trinket, object held a memory of a moment she had shared with Jeff. She had brought it all the way to Florida. She couldn’t bring them on to Orlando. The tears had rolled down her cheeks as she tossed the items into the fire one at a time. She watched the photos catch. Their smiling faces turned to dust before her. She thought it would work. Burning all the tangible objects of their time together would be enough to rid the memories. It wasn’t. She no longer had the box of memories to shove in the back of a closet, but she still had the box of memories in her head. No matter how she tried to shove it to the dark recesses is her mind, he always crept to the forefront. He was always right there. 

Catching the time, she sighed. Lunch was over and she needed to get back to the floor. While she walked back, she stuff half of the turkey sandwich she’d brought from home in her mouth and tossed the rest. Her whole break was spent thinking of Jeff, she hadn’t even eaten. Guzzling the Pepsi she had gotten from the machine, she ducked into the bathroom to wash her hands.

“There you are!” Carrie stood at the sink washing her hands. Their eyes met in the mirror.

Rachel froze. A smile pasted on her face. Carrie had become one of her closest friends since moving to Orlando. She had also made it a mission to get her dating again. Carrie was constantly trying to set her up on dates. Some she went on. Most she danced her way out of. “Here I am.” She was stuck. She couldn’t very well back out of the bathroom. Carrie would chase her down and try to beat her in to submission. 

“Don’t look so scared,” Carrie laughed as she dried her hands. “So…”

“No.” Rachel shook her head as she washed her hands.

“You don’t even know what I’m going to say.”

“Yes I do.” Rachel pulled the paper towels from the dispenser and dried her hands. “You have the perfect guy you want me to meet. He’s smart. He’s funny. He’s cute. He’d be perfect for me.”

“So you’ll meet him?” Carrie smiled hopefully.

“No.” Rachel shook her head. 

“Come on,” Carrie groaned. “Stop letting the asshole win.”

Carrie had referred to Jeff as ‘The Asshole’ once she had gotten the whole story. It had started to catch on with others in their circle and even those on the outside. Some people didn’t even know Jeff’s name. They just knew ‘The Asshole’ referred to the jerk in Rachel’s past. 

“I’m not.” Carrie crossed her arms and stared at her. Rachel fidgeted, shifting on her feet. She finally had to break eye contact and look down. She sighed. 

“Yes you are.” Carrie said softly. “Every time you turn down meeting someone. Every time you go out with someone and don’t give them a fair chance. Every time you sit in your apartment with a glass of wine instead of coming out with us. You are letting him win. Don’t do this. You know he’s not wasting time thinking about you.”

Rachel felt her eyes fill with tears. 

“I know that hurts,” Carrie put a comforting hand on her arm. It wasn’t something she hadn’t said before. She said it numerous times when she was able to coerce Rachel out for drinks to try and cheer her up. To get her out of a depression and into a funk. “But it’s the truth. That asshole isn’t thinking about you. He’s not sitting in some office in a fancy suit thinking about the girl he dated in college. But he will. One of these days somewhere down the road he’s gonna look back on his life and realize how much he fucked up by letting you get away. He’s gonna realize that you were the best thing in his life. And it’s going to be too late because by then you will have realized he wasn’t the best thing. You’re gonna find the best thing. You’re gonna run in to the asshole – hopefully with your car,” she smiled when Rachel giggled. “You’re gonna happen upon him one of these years. He’s forehead will have gotten bigger because his hairline receded. His belt is gonna be notched at a bigger hole. On his arm will be a pretty thing sure with her perfect manicure and size zero waist. Her smile will be as fake as the blonde color on her head. His eyes will be dead inside. You on the other hand will be simply gorgeous because you’ll be radiating happiness. You’ll be arm and arm with your one. You won’t be able to keep the smile off your face and the hearts out of your eyes. He’ll be hanging on to your every word. The asshole will call out your name and you’ll look at him confused. You don’t know this man. He’ll say, ‘It’s the asshole! Remember?’ You’ll stared at him, your eyes scrunched as you search for a memory. It will come to you. You’ll remember and you won’t feel anything at all. Nothing. You’ll say ‘Oh hello.’ Then pull your man away forgetting you even saw him again. Meanwhile he’ll be staring after you wondering why he ever walked away. You’ll haunt his days for the rest of his life as he thinks about what might have been.”

“I don’t want to be like this,” Rachel whispered. “I don’t want him to haunt me day after day. But I do. I miss him and I don’t know how to stop.”

“By finding someone or something else to take his place. That’s not work.” Carrie told her. “Don’t think I don’t know about you picking up all this overtime.” She eyed her accusingly. “Come out with me tonight.”

“And meet someone?”

“Meet a bunch of someone’s,” Carrie shrugged. “Nick and Mike are meeting some friends tonight. Come out with us. The gang will be there. It’s not a date. We’re all just going out to The Attic.”

“There’s gonna be dancing involved?” Rachel scrunched her face. 

Carrie laughed. “Mostly alcohol. You know Nick doesn’t dance. That boy has no rhythm.” 

“It sure is fun to watch him try though.” Rachel laughed. “Who’s all coming?”

“Me, Nick, Mike and his girlfriend Jen, my sister Lisa. I think she’s bringing a friend. Nick has a couple friends who are back in town coming.”

“No set up.” 

Carrie raised her hand. “I swear. No set up.”

“Alright.” Rachel said giving in. “What time?”

Carried squealed and pulled Rachel in to a hug. “We’ll pick you up at 9.”

*~*

“You look amazing,” Carrie said as they walked along the sidewalk to The Attic.

“That’s not what I was going for.” Rachel frowned. 

Carrie eyed her friend. “What look were you going for?”

“Emotionally unavailable?”

“Missed it by a mile,” Carrie laughed. “That outfit is screaming pick me up and take me home.”

Rachel’s eyes widened as she stopped on the sidewalk causing Carrie and Nick to stop and look back at her. “No.” She shook her head. “That’s not what I’m going for. No. Not at all. This was a bad idea.

Carrie shared a look with Nick before walking back to her friend. “No. You’re here. You’re going on. You’re gonna drink. You’re gonna have a good time. Rachel you look amazing. You look great.”

Rachel wore a pleated black cotton skirt that came about four inches from her knees. Her shirt was a ribbed crop top, white with small blue stripes. Between the shirt and skirt there was an inch of skin that played peek-a-boo. Over top of the shirt, she had on a white washed denim chambray button down shirt with 3/4ths sleeves. She had left it unbuttoned and tied the ends together at her waist. Her blonde hair was in wavy curls. Her makeup was minimal. A couple silver bracelets dangled from her left wrist. A simple necklace laid around her neck. On her feet were black ankle strap heels. 

“I didn’t mean to dress like this…” Rachel started as Carrie threaded her arm through hers and pulled her down the sidewalk. “I just pulled stuff from my dresser and put it on and…”

“That’s how people normally get dressed.” Carrie said dryly. 

It was 9:30 by the time they entered The Attic. Traffic had slowed them up from Rachel’s place. The club was starting to pick up. In another hour it would be full as people began their Friday night partying. 

“Let me be the first to buy you a drink tonight,” Nick told Rachel with a grin. 

“You always remember your first,” Carrie said with a wink. She stood by his side and looked out into the club, searching. She looked at Rachel who looked around with club with trepidation. “Just give it a chance. You don’t have to do anything but sit, relax, drink, laugh, and have a good time.”

“And maybe dance,” Nick said as he handed the girls their drinks. He picked his up and laid the money down on the bar telling the bartender to keep the change. 

“Oh yeah, dance,” Carrie laughed. “You mean like this?” She started doing an imitation of Nick dancing. Her feet stayed firmly planted in place. Her body only moved from the waist up. Most of the movement came from her shoulders.

“I see Nick’s dance moves haven’t changed.”

Rachel turned at the new voice and her eyes widened. Standing in front of her was JC Chasez. He wore a white t-shirt with a graphic across his chest and dark wash jeans. There was a wide leather strap bracelet around his wrist. A black cord around his neck with a silver medallion hanging from it. His eyes were bright blue. His hair was shaggy, curly. Pushed back from his eyes. It was long enough to touch the collar of his t-shirt.

“JC you fucker,” Nick laughed. He slapped his friend’s hand, grabbing hold pulling him into a one armed hug. “How the hell have you been?”

“Can’t complain.” JC chuckled as he released Nick. “Just got back from Europe.”

“You didn’t think to take me?”

“And have Carrie whoop my ass?” JC laughed. “No thanks.”

“She would too,” Carrie grinned as she hugged JC. “It’s so good to see you.”

“Good to see you.” JC grinned as he pulled away. “You keeping him in line?”

“She’s got a tight hold on the leash.” Nick laughed. 

“I let it out every so often.”

“Yeah but she’s quick to yank it back.”

JC laughed and moved his eyes from his friends to the woman who was standing quietly to the side. Nick had told him Carrie was bringing a friend along tonight. Awareness trickled in when her eyes met his. “Hi. I’m JC,” he held out his hand, a smile on his face.

Rachel slowly lifted her hand for him to clasp. His blue eyes captivated her. “Rachel.” When he sent her a smile, her heart stumbled.

Nick and Carrie exchanged grins. It took Carrie everything she had not to jump for joy. “Is everyone here?”

JC forced himself to drop Rachel’s hand and look away. He met Nick’s knowing grin. “Yeah, we have a table already. Come on.” He led them through the crowd and to a table in the back corner.

“Cute huh?” Carrie whispered, nudging her friend knowingly. 

“Shut up.”

*~*

“Tell the spider story!” Carrie said as the laughter from the table started to abide. 

“What?” Rachel asked sitting her drink down. “No,” she shook her head. “You were there. You tell it.”

“Does this involve a spider in an orifice?” Joey Fatone grinned.

“Ew!” Rachel scrunched her face up at the thought. 

“Can you imagine being in the ER and pulling this foreign object out of the rectum and out pops a spider?” Carrie laughed. “Oh Rachel! You’d hit the roof and run screaming!”

“I hate those beady eyed little bastards.” Rachel shuddered. “I’d probably end up on the floor and need a doctor myself.”

“So what’s the spider story?” JC asked from his spot next to Rachel. They hadn’t ended up sitting next to each other at the beginning of the night, but the seating arrangements seemed to change every time someone got up to go to the bathroom or the dance floor. Eventually he ended up next to her and he made sure he kept the position.

“So this older guy was getting a kidney stone blasted. He was in his 50s. I was in the room watching. Another nurse went over the patient who was draped, which means everything is covered expect for the body part that’s going to be worked on. In this case…”

“His johnson.”

“Yes,” Rachel answered Joey. “The nurse starts laughing and calls the doctor over who starts laughing. So I go over to see what’s so funny. There…right there on his…his…”

“Johnson,” Carrie supplied with a smirk.

“His flaccid penis,” Rachel said causing a few snorts from the table. “He had a tattoo of a spider.”

“On his junk?” Mike, Nick’s brother asked. His drink frozen right at his lips.

“On his junk.” Rachel confirmed. 

JC shivered involuntarily. He hated needles to begin with. Getting shots was never fun for him. But someone voluntarily getting a tattoo on his… he shuddered again. 

“But why?” Joey asked. “Did you ever find out why he had a spider on his dick?”

“I couldn’t take it. I had to know. So when I was in his room later, I asked him.” Rachel could feel a blush spreading across her face. She could hear Carrie already laughing. “He told me, with a huge smile on his face, ‘when it grows it turns in to a tarantula’.”

The table burst into laughter. 

“Poor Rachel was so mortified when she came out.” Carrie wiped away a tear from laughing. “I nearly peed myself laughing when she told me the story.”

“Come on,” Nick downed the rest of his drink. “Let’s dance. Let’s see if you can make anything grow.”

Carrie burst out laughing as she stood up. Her reply was lost in a whisper to his ear. Rachel didn’t need to hear what was said. Judging by the look on Nick’s face when Carrie drew back let her know the vulgarity of her words. 

“You wanna dance?” JC asked Rachel as the rest of the table followed Carrie and Nick. 

“I don’t…” Rachel looked up from the table and met his eyes. Bright blue eyes stared back at her. She found herself giving in. “Sure.” The smile he sent her was rewarding enough. He then took her hand as he slid from the booth and pulled her up. 

“You have better dance moves than Nick?” JC kept a tight hold on her hand keeping her close to his side as he worked through the throng of people to a spot the dance floor.

“Those inflatable tubes outside car dealerships have better dance moves than Nick.” 

JC laughed. “What do you expect from a lawyer?”

“That answer is more vulgar than what Carrie just whispered in Nick’s ear a few minutes ago.” Rachel chuckled. 

“Oh yeah,” JC pulled her to a stop and turned her to face him as the music changed. He met her eyes and smiled as they started dancing. The dance floor grew crowded and they were pushed closer together. His hands touched her hips. His index fingers slid across bare skin. The bare skin that had teased him when he first saw her at the bar.

Rachel spun around and pressed close to him. Their bodies moved to the music. His hands stayed on her hips and she found she liked them there. Liked feeling the heat of his hand touching her skin. Liked feeling that almost possessive hold. Opening her eyes she caught Carrie looking at her with a huge grin on his face. Her friend shot her two thumbs up. Rachel rolled her eyes and forgot about her friend as she danced with the guy behind her. 

“Let me buy you a drink.” JC said a little while later. It was hot on the dance floor between the dancing and crowd.

“Sure,” Rachel said as she put her hand in his and let him lead her through the people toward the bar. “Your friend always follow you around?”

“What?” JC looked over his shoulder seeing Lonnie close behind. “Oh… yeah. That’s Lonnie. He’s my bodyguard.”

“Ah, so he’s the Frank Farmer to your Rachel Marron.” Rachel’s lips trembled with a teasing smile.

“No.” JC shook his head quickly. “No. Just no.” 

Rachel giggled at the look on JC’s face. She looked over her shoulder at Lonnie again and gave him a finger wiggling wave. “You’re right. He’s no Kevin Costner.”

“I am no Whitney Houston,” he pressed a thumbed into her side tickling her.

Rachel giggled, sidestepping away. “But you are closer to being a pop diva than—“

JC narrowed his eyes at her. His lips twitched in a smile he fought so hard to hold off. “I’m beginning to think you don’t want me to buy you this drink.”

“Oh no.” Rachel moved in closer as JC found a small open spot at the bar. JC shuffled her in to the open spot and stood close behind her. The cologne he wore engulfed her. She breathed it in and it seeped to every part of her body. It was intoxicating. “You promised me a drink.” She tapped the bar. “Buy the lady a drink.”

JC got the bartender’s attention who quickly came over to get his order. 

“You ever ditch him?”

“Lonnie?” JC asked and saw Rachel nod. Her hair rubbed against his cheek. The strands catching in the stubble. He had shaved that morning but hadn’t before going out. “We used to ditch them all the time. You should have seen us trying to sneak back in to our hotel rooms without getting caught.”

“Sort of like sneaking out of the house as teenagers huh?” Rachel lifted the drink from the bar and took a sip. The alcohol burned and she grimaced. Using the straw, she gave it a quick stir. Taking another sip she turned around. JC still stood close behind her. With her heels she stood at eye level. Once again she was staring into his eyes. Almost hypnotized by the blueness. 

“You don’t strike me as the type who snuck out of the house.” 

“Oh please,” Rachel laughed. “You know who throws the best parties in a hicktown?”

JC shook his head, a smile on his lips as he watched her. “Who?”

“Amish.” Rachel said and watched his eyes widen. She grinned ruefully. “Oh yeah. Way off the road, back in the corner of a field. Hundreds of people. And all the beer you could drink. It tasted like piss water, but at 16 you really didn’t care.”

JC laughed as he listened to the story. “That’s true. When you’re underage all that matters is that it had alcohol in it. While we were in Germany, Lance and Justin would give us money to buy them beer. They were still underage. We’d buy them the shittiest stuff. Oh man, it was Godawful. Piss water probably would have tasted better than this shit. They thought it was the best stuff ever.”

“What kind of friends are you?” Rachel laughed. “Buying your friends shitty beer. What did you do? Use the money leftover to buy yourselves the good stuff?” She gasped as JC nodded. “You did not!” She tossed back her head and laughed. “My God! They probably didn’t know what to think when they hit 21. I would have loved to see their faces when they realized that beer actually didn’t taste bad. You guys are terrible.”

“It was harmless fun,” JC shrugged chuckling. 

“Harmless? You could have ruined their taste buds.”

“Then it wouldn’t have mattered it all would have tasted like shit anyway.”

“Awful. Just awful.” She shook her head. The smile was still on her lips when she took another drink. 

“How did you and Carrie meet?” The person standing next to Rachel left and JC slid in to the spot as it was closing. There wasn’t enough space for them to face the bar. They each had to turn sideways. More jostling at the bar as patrons took their drinks and left and more came caused them to shift closer together.

“We work together.” Rachel told him. “She was the first person I really met when I moved here a couple years ago. You know the devil and the angel that sits on everyone’s shoulders?” She continued when he nodded. “She’s the devil on my shoulder. Constantly pulling me in to bad decisions.”

“That sounds like Nick.”

“How did you guys meet?”

“His father was one of the lawyers for the Mickey Mouse Club. We met at one of the end of the year parties. He was trying to spike the punch.”

“Typical.” Rachel rolled her eyes. “I can’t imagine Daddy Conner was thrilled.”

“Oh man,” JC chuckled. “He snatched up him so quickly. We all stared in shock certain it was the last time we’d see him. We didn’t care. We hated him. He hated us. Bunch of kids singing and dancing. He’d make fun of us every time he saw us.”

“No. That doesn’t sound like Nick.”

“It was high school Nick. It was the summer I was turning 17. I stayed here in Orlando even though filming was finished instead of going back to Maryland. We ran in to each other and started hanging out.”

“And he realized you weren’t a dork?”

“Well I was still a dork.” JC laughed. “He still made fun of me. It just wasn’t as mean as it used to be.”

“So he cut your balls and you both laughed.”

“Something like that.” JC finished his drink and sat it down on the bar. “You wanna dance some more?”

“Sure.” She sat her glass down next to his. When she turned back to him he was waiting with a smile on his face. She found herself returning his smile with one of her own. When he reached for her hand she looked down as she placed her hand in his. She never allowed another man to hold her hand during all the aborted dates she went on. They had tried, but she was always quick to break the contact. Now, staring down at her hand clasped in his, she didn’t mind. She closed her fingers around his hand and looked up.

It was JC smiling back at her.

*~*

“It looks good on you.”

“What?” Rachel said meeting Carrie’s eyes in the bathroom mirror. 

“Happiness. It looks good on you.” Carrie smiled. “I’ve never seen you look this way. There this new aura around you…”

“Aura?” Rachel repeated. “You’ve been hanging out on Hillcrest again haven’t you?”

“Always good to know your karma,” Carrie said as she continued, not even bothering to jump to Rachel’s bait. She knew what her friend thought of the metaphysical. “Your eyes are brighter than I remember seeing them. You have this huge smile on your face. My God Rachel…you’re beautiful!”

“Stop,” Rachel said looking down at her hands as she washed them. Her face heated at Carrie’s words. 

“No. You’re seriously glowing!” Carrie gushed. “You have to feel different. Do you feel it?”

Rachel raised her head and met Carrie’s eyes in the mirror. A smile grew on her face. “I feel good. It feels good to feel this way again.”

“Yes!” Carrie shook her fist to the sky as she looked up toward the ceiling. “Finally! I told you! You needed to get out. You needed to get out, let your hair down. Let loose and have fun.”

“I’ve done exactly what we’re doing many times over the past two years. It’s never worked before.”

“Maybe it’s the company.” Carries grinned, wiggling her eyebrows. She laughed when she saw her friend blush. “He’s definitely smitten with you.”

“I don’t know if I want him to be smitten with me.”

“Who doesn’t want a hunk of a man smitten with them? My God,” Carrie fanned herself. “JC is hot! Those jeans he’s wearing… I want to knock something over and make him pick it up. Girl tell me you touched? Tell me while you guys were dancing you reached out and grabbed hold?”

Rachel shook her head. Her face was completely on fire listening to Carrie. She didn’t dispute her claims. JC was hot. The jeans sat on his hips and were what fantasies were made of. The whole ensemble – necklace, leather bracelets, jeans, the messy hair. It was all what fantasies were made of. He wasn’t even near her and she could smell him. In the bathroom stall she had a moment of weakness. She lowered her head and sniffed her shirt. Her eyes closed as she caught JC’s cologne. 

“Why the hell not! Girl! Come on!” Carrie said exasperated. “Such a nice piece of real estate.”

“Knock it off,” Rachel rolled her eyes. “If you keep this up, I’m not gonna be able to meet his eyes.”

“What color are they?”

“Blue.”

Carrie grinned triumphantly. “I have asked that question for every guy you went out with since I was able to get you to go out with the first one. You’ve never been able to tell me. Not once.” 

Rachel looked at herself in the mirror. She didn’t look different. At least not that she could tell. Maybe her eyes were brighter. Her smile wider. She could feel a difference though. She felt lighter. She didn’t feel like there was a huge cloud hanging over her. There wasn’t a weight on her shoulders. She held her palms to her face, feeling the coolness. 

“What do you want to do?”

Rachel stared at herself as she pondered Carrie’s question. She finally met Carrie’s and smiled. “I want to go dance.”

“Hell yeah!” Carrie grabbed Rachel’s hand and pulled her from the bathroom. With that hand she led them on to the dance floor and started dancing. 

“Maybe I should have been more specific.” Rachel said bemused as she started dancing with Carrie. 

“Too good for me now?”

Rachel laughed. “It wasn’t your ass you wanted me to grab.”

Carrie laughed and turned around, presenting her denim clad behind for Rachel. “Grab all you want honey.” She gave it a little shake. 

“I don’t know if I want to watch or join whatever is going on right now.”

Rachel turned and saw Nick and JC standing together watching them. Her face flamed. “You can take my place,” she told Nick. “She’s all yours.”

“Damn right,” Nick growled and grabbed Carrie spinning her into his hold, pressed completely against his body. 

“Alcohol makes Nick dance better.” 

“That’s not all it makes him better at,” she said dryly. She felt a blush cross her face as JC started laughing. “I did not mean to say that. You did not need to know that. I didn’t even need to know that. Not that it stopped Carrie from telling me. I didn’t even want to know and she’s got me thinking too much. Talking about eyes and asses and throwing hers out for me to grab and shut me up…”

JC laughed as they started to dance. “Nick and I should have been a few seconds slower working our way to you two.”

“Her ass isn’t the one she was talking about grabbing,” Rachel said and groaned. “I’m cutting myself off. No more drinking.”

“You want to grab mine?” JC whispered hotly in her ear. “You can. I won’t mind.” He frowned when Rachel stopped dancing and froze. “Rachel?” She took a step away from him and turned around to face him. “Hey…”

“I’m sorry,” Rachel shook her head. She hadn’t let her mind think far into the night. What it would mean to dance with him, to let him buy her drinks. “I need to stop this.”

“Stop what?” JC frowned. “Dancing? Okay. We can get drinks and go back to the table…” he trailed off when she shook her head. “Look, if this is about what I said earlier, I was just joking…”

“I’m not going home with you.” Rachel blurted out.

JC’s eyes widened at her words and he looked around seeing the stares it drew. He took her hand and pulled her to the side of the dance floor. “Rachel…”

“Look,” She dropped his hand. “I don’t know what Nick and Carrie told you about me, if anything. But I went through a break up and I’m just not ready…” she paused and pressed her hands to her cheeks again. “Tonight was the first time I’ve been able to actually look at someone and see them and not see him. I’ve had such a good time tonight. Talking. Dancing…I don’t mind when you take my hand. Your eyes are blue. I know this. I see them. I see you when I look at you. And I like it. But I should have been upfront from the very beginning. I wasn’t. And I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“Hey hey hey,” JC reached for her hands again. He squeezed them and ducked his head trying to meet her eyes. “Listen to me,” he said softly when she finally met his gaze. “Nick said a coworker of Carrie’s was coming. He said you were dealing with a breakup but didn’t go in to any details. I wasn’t looking to start something. I’m just enjoying your company. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable with that statement. I am sorry. I really am. Sometimes I say stuff I shouldn’t. It gets me in to trouble a lot.” He gave her a self deprecating smile. “I’m not expecting anything at the end of the night. I’m not trying to bring you home…not that I wouldn’t try under different circumstances. You’re beautiful.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “You’re beautiful. You’re funny. I’m having a great time with you tonight. Just talking and dancing. I feel like I can talk to you all night. You’re not wigged out about who I am. If you are, you’re doing a very good job at hiding it. I’m just hoping that when you are ready you’ll keep me in mind.”

Rachel’s eyes shone with tears. “I’m sorry about this.”

“No don’t apologize.” JC shook his head. “You have nothing to apologize for. I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable…Maybe I should go that way you can enjoy the rest of your night.”

“No!” This time it was Rachel who reached for his hand. “Please don’t go.” She closed her eyes with a groan. “You could probably add crazy down to your list of attributes.”

“Nah,” JC smiled, squeezing her hand. “How about we pick this up from when you came out of the bathroom.”

Rachel smiled appreciatively at him. “Should I walk away then come back?”

“Only if you need too.” She made no move. “So. What do you feel like doing? We can go to the bar where I can buy you a drink or you can buy me one. Or we can buy our own. No expectations.”

Rachel laughed and felt herself start to relax. “I sort of want to dance.”

“Lead the way,” JC swept his hand out letting her go first. He grew confused when she took a step forward then turned to face him. 

“Out there we’ll be forced to move the way everyone else is. Bodies are so close together…” Rachel explained when she meet his confused gaze. “Here where it’s not so crowded, we can move how we want.” She looked down and drew a breath. “I’m not ready for ass grabbing yet, but I’m not opposed to being held as we dance. I think…”

JC smiled and tugged her to him. He placed one arm around her waist. His hand was high enough where his pinky barely touched the bared skin at her waist. She wasn’t pressed right against him; he left a sliver of space between them. Her hand pressed lightly on his back. His skin felt on fire beneath her touch. He briefly wondered how it would feel against his skin but he shoved the thought away. He didn’t want to mess this up. There was something between them. He could feel it.

*~*

The night drew to a close all too soon. Last call had come and gone. The group spilled out onto the sidewalk. Laughing, talking, and carrying on as they made their way toward the parking lot. 

“You’re way too interested in hearing stories of what’s been pulled out of people’s asses,” Carrie laughed as Joey hounded her for another story. 

“It’s funny to think of what people actually shove up there. Then having to explain what’s up there to a doctor.” Joey laughed. “How embarrassing.”

“Never had the urge to shove something up your ass?”

“No but I’m feeling the urge to shove my foot up yours.”

“Kinky,” Nick laughed. “Would that also be considered a foot fetish?”

“You’re a dumbass,” Carrie rolled her eyes at her boyfriend. “I’m not sure why I even keep you around.”

“Probably the tarantula in his pants,” Mike laughed.

“If a man told me he had a tarantula in his pants, I’d probably swat it with a flyswatter and spray it with an entire can of Raid.”

“Careful what you call that thing in your pants C. Might not end well for you.”

“I would hardly call it a thing.” JC responded. He squeezed Rachel’s hand. The night had proved better for them after their little talk. He felt Rachel had actually relaxed more without the expectation of something more happening. They had danced to the music in their own heads on the edge of the dance floor. They might have looked weird to people, but they didn’t care. When they pulled themselves from the dance floor, he led her to the bar where he had graciously let her buy him a no expectations drink. They took their drinks back to the table where they continued to talk uninterrupted. Their friends were still on the dance floor. He had been true to his word, he had backed off. He didn’t touch unless she instigated. She led. He followed. He didn’t want to scare her off. He had a feeling she was important to him. He wanted to see where this was going to lead. 

Mike and Jen cut off from their group first in the parking lot as they reached their car. Lisa and her friend Kim soon followed. It wasn’t long before Joey went to a vehicle followed by Lonnie.

“Oh come on C! You’re gonna walk her to her car?” Joey yelled seeing JC not stopping at their vehicle. 

“Yes I am.”

“But that means Lonnie will follow! What happens if I get attacked by overzealous girls?”

“Enjoy?”

“This is true,” Joey purses his lips and nodded. “This is true,” he repeated as the remaining members of the group walked down the parking lot, trailed by Lonnie.

“How long are you in town for?” Nick asked as they came to his vehicle.

“Couple of weeks then headed to California.” JC answered.

“Great. Hit me up so we can hang.” Nick slapped JC’s hand and pulled him in to another back slapping hug.

“Count on it,” JC told his friend. 

“I’ll be watching you,” Carrie warned as she hugged him. 

“Didn’t figure any other way,” JC said with a smile and released her. Then it was just he and Rachel. And Lonnie a few paces away standing guard for those overzealous fans Joey was wishing for.

“I had a really great time tonight.” Rachel said with a smile. 

“Me too,” JC smiled at her. He watched as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and wished he had been able to make that movement instead. “I wasn’t giving you a line earlier. When I said to keep me in mind when you’re ready.”

“Oh!” Rachel gasped and reached in to her pocket. She pulled out a crumbled napkin. Flattening it the best she could, she handed it to him. “I know it’s tacky, but I felt it was appropriate given the atmosphere.”

JC looked at the napkin and grinned. Her phone number. “I’ll call you.” He promised and put the napkin in his front pocket. 

Rachel’s breath caught when he took a step forward. She stared at him, her eyes slightly widened. He lowered his head and brushed his lips against hers before settling into the kiss. He didn’t make a move to deepen the kiss. He kept it light; his lips moving with hers. 

When he broke the kiss he waited for her to open her eyes and look at him. “Who do you see?” He whispered. 

“You.” 

Rachel’s lips still tingled when she laid her head down on her pillow later that night. His cologne blanketed her thanks to the chambray shirt she still wore. As she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep it was a man with shaggy brown curls and bright blue eyes that crinkled when he smiled she pictured. 

She was over him


End file.
